Monday, April 13, 2009

Was considering what, specifically, drove Robyn Gibson to divorce The Mel.

Was it the various infidelities over the course of their 28 year marriage?

Or Melbert's anti-semitic tirades over french toast at brunch?

Okay, maybe the last straw was Maverick, the movie. But that was 15 years ago! Surely even that celluloid turd was forgiven, if not forgotten. And anyway, he's spent $750,000 on whores and tequila since Lethal Weapon 4.

Mel reports that the couple actually separated in "late August of 2006." Only three months before Congress was retaken by Democrats. Perhaps Mel went Passion of the Mad Max on the fam in anticipation of the coming Republican bloodletting. We know his penchant for the apocalyptic.

She just couldn't take the, "Two men enter, One man leaves," taunting any more. Me either. Remember the second half of Thunderdome? What were we thinking loving that movie?

Can you imagine spending 28 years with Mad Max? It would be like FREEDOM! everyday for the rest of your life.

Come to think of it, maybe that's why Mrs. Gibson finally chose divorce: Mel may not be a real person, he's an amalgam of his on-screen personas.

And on top of that he had Britney Spears to his Costa Rican home!

He can keep that house.

1 comment:

  1. i think it was constantly being called "sugar tits," as in, "sugar tits, go fix me a turkey pot pie," or, "suck my cock, sugar tits."